it's very ordinary evening and then i realize it's post-mid-april already. so i ask my 18-year old son, "what's going on with prom?" and as the words come out of my mouth, i think...
...oh my lord.
he hasn't finished working on the "date" part. so he says, "just ask me on friday."
stay tuned, i'll update on friday. no kidding.
as a parent to two teenagers and a near-tween, i thought i had covered almost every topic of discussion with my children, until i came home on tuesday night and was faced with this news from my 15-year old..."a boy in my school committed suicide." it left me breathless. i tried to get some answers as well as ask some questions, but i kept coming up with the same conclusion - the teenage years are exciting and dreadful at the same time, for some more than others. my prayers go out to his friends & family.
i have this "thing" called "my oreo cookie". it's not a real cookie, but a concept that i have adopted about the immediate girls/women in my life - my mother and my daughters. when i photograph weddings, i love to do generational pictures. nothing speaks to me more about the longevity of a family than seeing multiple generations together. i had been part of my own oreo cookie, for about 18 years. then after my mother passed away, i had my own daughters, and my dearest wish was to be the creamy filling. i am, after all, a motherless mother - one who has to face the struggles of parenthood without the guidance that only a mother can provide. for some people, this "cookie" may seem like a silly concept, but for me, it was something i longed for that i had finally resigned myself to never having...until 2 weeks ago.
i returned home for a quick visit and shortly before my arrival it had dawned on me that there was one special woman who has always been my cookie - my grandmother (mommy's mom). she'd been there all along, but i was so consumed thinking about my mother's absence that i had failed to see her there. she's almost 100 now and unable to participate in daily activities. but every time i go home, she's there for a few minutes, enough to remember me and to greet me with a smile. so with my younger daughter by my side, i asked my husband to take a photo of my oreo cookie.
sometimes when you don't have all the ingredients in your recipe, you just gotta improvise.
this is my kuya ("koo-ya"), my big brother. not by blood and not that that matters. we've been friends since 1975, when i was the new girl in the first grade class and my desk was seated next to his. we've even walked down the aisle a few times (side-by-side for first communion, confirmation & graduation from high school). he, along with my husband, was at my side the night my mother died and together they saved me that summer, just by keeping me smiling.
we live in separate countries now, but still keep in touch every few weeks. it's been 10 years since we last saw each other, so my family took a little road trip so i could meet up with him again during his stopover. we got to meet his family too. it was the best 36 hours i've spent in a long time - laughing and eating and laughing again...and again...and again.
some things never change :)
having attended possibly the smallest high school in my large city (in physical size, although we were actually almost 1500 students at one point), i never had the opportunity to be part of the thrill & excitement that is "friday night lights", or simply put - high school football. tonight was only my 3rd football game in the stands, but what a game it was. my kids' high school team made it all the way to their division state finals, and against the other local/rival high school. it was an especially great game for us because my son's good friend is a defensive end on the team.
i am a fan of many sports, but i only watched football occasionally. this game was unbelievable! there were some crazy plays that you would have had to see to believe. our team was the underdog (the other team is 6th in the nation and undefeated this year) and they put up an amazing fight. i would have hated to watch a blowout, and this game was anything but. 20-15 was the final score and at one point we did lead. even more special for this group of kids - the whole lot of them were all part of the same class as freshman. these were friends playing friends. at the end of the game, members of the winning team were consoling our players. where else would you see that?
i'm so proud of our school, of its team, of its students, and of their fans. it's somewhat of a coincidence, but appropriate, that the colors of my blog are purple and gold. but tonight, they're the only colors that count. congratulations to both teams!
i just came back from my son's high school after attending a session on starting your child's college application process. i was coming straight from work so i didn't have time to change out of my work attire. but i suppose it didn't matter anyway given the exchange that went on with two volunteer moms there who were directing the flow of parents.
lady #1 - "are you the parent of a senior?"
me - "yes"
lady #2 - "WOW"
- thanks mom & dad!
so many times when my son was a tot, i remember thinking how quickly he would grow up and one day, he wouldn't want to hang out with me anymore. and in recent years, we kinda do our own thing, but together. i've always been a realist about his growing up, so i can't say seeing him getting ready for his own life upsets me. he's got a wonderful group of friends - they're more like the brothers he'll never have, i guess. and i was so happy to spend an afternoon with them, taking their senior photos. i can imagine how awkward it may be, having your mom photograph you and your friends, but all the boys took it in stride, even having fun with "the parentals". it was the highlight of my afternoon.
